the cold water runs
falling in sheets around my body
and where it hits
it is met with a shiver
and goosebumps rise
as it snakes down my back.
the shower head is nothing
but a deliverer of feelings.
but i asked for this,
when i stepped into the icy water
hoping it would fix me
instead of freezing me.
the water is like ice
cutting through to my bones
and it hurts.
my body aches
regardless of how physically harmless
the water really is.
and i suppose that’s the same
as my feelings for you.
they hurt
and they send shivers down my spine
but physically
i am fine.
to most, i’m just another girl
standing in the shower.
no one could know my internal battle
as i fight the urge to cry out
as my surroundings cut me open
from the inside out.
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